sometimes miracles & messy go hand in hand

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**i am sharing some tidbits below so you know that things are not perfect.  bloggers don't always share scenes behind their life and they shouldn't have to.  not everyone is called to do that.  that is not their purpose)

sometimes miracles and messy go hand in hand

new refrigerator broke so for the last week we are using the garage as the refrigerator and the back deck for the freezer (thankful for below zero temps huh?:) the dishwasher didn't work 2 out of the 3 toilets clogged we had a  snowmaggeddon with sub zero temps moving and then having the shop at the old house so i had to travel back and forth the best i could in the bad weather a business that is beginning to thrive my daughter and the grand babies staying for a week washer / dryer still at the other place dealing with daily pain from my last surgery and this whole bag thing...ugh!! truly is life changing i have a third and final surgery coming up

and i stand looking in on my life on one hand i am so miserable each day..physically but on the other hand God has stood me back up on my feet in WONDER!

for the first time in my life i have no resources of my own one of my strengths has always been that i "felt" i could work circles around everyone...i mean i really thought i was superwoman i ran the whole house...did all of my children's responsibilities even!  i taught a woman's sunday school class..all while having a newborn and homeschooling the other children i seem to be able to see other people's potential and would use my energy trying to make them have the drive to "be what i saw they could be" even though they didn't care to be that

crazy right?

well now...the last oh...7-8 years developing a chronic disease that slowly ate up my intestines even while i pushed through all of that for years as if i wasn't sick...landed me last april with my colon being totally removed and having a bag attached to my abdomen to go to the bathroom in

so lets say this that that LIE in my right hand that i was believing and trusting in was that i had the strength to do many things without God didn't work anymore and that put me in a downward spiral for quite sometime

so when God blindsided me with this house and the news i will be sharing later this week please KNOW there is a BIG BACK STORY to all of THIS --

while i am FULL...i mean FULL of praise right now and WONDER at all that God is doing...i don't DARE take it for granted..i am fearful that i would and that would devastate me

mark batterson says it perfectly for me--

having a vision beyond your resources is synonymous with dreaming big and it may feel like your setting yourself up for failure, but your actually setting god up for a miracle. how God performs the miracle is His job my job is drawing a circle around the God given dream and if i do my part i might just find myself standing 3 feet in quail

now drawing circles around things is not some magic formula i remember the first time i knew God spoke to me while i was reading the bible i wrote the date beside the verse it was august 12, 1996 i remember was in the "office" of our home on 213 sitting on the floor

it was then that i began to know God has a plan for me and as the years went by i would jot down the date next to verse i felt God bring to life for me at times i thought i "knew" what God was going to do

but most of the time i tried to figure them out..or understand them which kept me from doing anything about them

friends::  it is in the stepping out and doing..it is in the trusting..it is ACTION..it is RISK how many ways can one say it before we HEAR IT...by hearing it we DO SOMETHING!

that was 18 years ago!

in God's timing things can take a long time which drives our human selves crazy

so please please don't read my story and compare it to your story what i can share with you is that those 18 years were bitter years that stole so much of my life and my children's there has been permanent damage done..breaches that may never be mended our heart are like a piece of fine wood fine sandpaper can smooth out a rough spot but take a course grit sandpaper used with force altars the wood.  scaring it.  forever changing its shape

and that is kinda what's happened to our hearts

wounded people hurt people and when they can't take responsibility for their actions and work on changing themselves it then turns to you..to me..to us we have to take responsibility for our choices and begin a grand adventure for yourself by taking God's hand and letting Him lead you out

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sorry this is so long:/ -  this is what i wrote in my journal over the weekend and i believe this mindset is what we need to begin practicing to be a GIRL ON FIRE!!  this shirt was inspired by my friend lissa..love ya girlie:)

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this shirt is in SHOP!  it will be available in other shirt styles soon

but listen...yesterday in my quiet time i read the whole book of hebrews and WOW!  some of it was hard but here is what i wrote in my journal that encouraged me and i hope encourages you... if you find yourself in a hard place today

let the spirit cup your heart with these words

leave finger painting and move on with the grand work of art ( i loved loved this!!)

move from salvation by self-help to trust toward God

there is SO MUCH MORE in God let's get on with it

stay on the course with committed faith abraham stuck it out - kept trusting God's promise until he got everything God promised

grab the promised hope with both hands and NEVER LET GO!

this new plan =covenant I'm making with israel isn't going to be written on paper, isn't going to be chiseled in stone; this time i'm writing out the plan IN THEM where?

IN ME..IN YOU!!

carving it out on the lining of their hearts i'll be their God they'll be my people

we can LIVE all OUT FOR GOD

stick it out

because we are NOT QUITTERS! who lose out on no, we'll stay with it and survive, trusting, ALL the WAY!

shoot adrenaline in your SOULS today

God HIMSELF is FIRE...the God in the burning bush...oh man i LOVE this word picture

that my God...the One who loves me through all my junk..is on FIRE!

so let's go outside where Jesus is not trying to be privileged insiders the inside world is not our home

let our hearts be stirred by sibi's post the new church lady?

let's light our hearts on fire by the God of FIRE and burn for Him so others can see and know God is real..He is personal

He longs to be a part of your story he can take all the back story and begin to recycle it into something beautifully useful

there has been years of pain to get to this exodus home...and the news i will be sharing in the next few days i am struggle with feeling guilty about but truly...i am overcoming that with trust.  why? because God is doing a work...not just this house but He is doing a work in hearts right now it is His work!  it is about God...not a house.  it is about relationship.  a relationship with God

to show us...HIM that believing in HIM....letting go of self help...and casting ourselves all over Him allows Him to do BIG things...He WANTS us to live out our dreams...HE PLANTED those DREAMS inside you we have gotten waaaay to man made in our faith

it is time to set your world on FIRE and begin together with God our GRAND WORD of ART

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oh darling shirt is available in the SHOP

because what i am tasting ...now...of God i want MORE of..not the things...HIM

and hebrews tells me...as well as every other book in the bible that there is so much MORE of God that we will never get full!!  it satisfies like nothing else i have ever tasted the more i step out in trust the MORE LOVED i feel the MORE SEEN i feel

i am now choosing to build my life on trust when hard things come understanding that it is these hard things that are teaching me to be able to run farther and faster

that God has a story to tell

no one else has my story and no one else has YOUR story

lets together be the adventurous pioneers of our time so the next generation can look back and say they never quit!

they endured they believed God and let's by our faith...our running the race and not quitting

set others FREE to to do the same imagine the landscape of america if this kinda of fire was burning brightly

instead of telling with our mouths what we stand against

let's start showing by how we LIVE...how BIG GOD is...and let GOD do the work after all HE is the spirit that moves hearts

not ranting and raving and pointing fingers

one last thought there is NO END to the parameters of your life when we choose to LIVE BRAVE

i will be sharing this key in the photo above and its meaning later this week..  praying your heart is stirred to let go of all that is holding you down and look to the ONLY ONE who will lead you out if you will be strong and courageous and TRUST

xo